A letter to my 18 year old self as I turn 29.


29 huh? That seemed so old and yet here we are. Entering the final year of our twenties. It is going to fly by.

Life isn't exactly how you imagined it 11 years ago. But then in a way, I think it's better than you could ever have imagined.

That boy you plucked up the courage to ask out at Sixth Form? Well he's still around despite the fact you were so sure you were going to go your separate ways once you went off to Uni. You never did move away to Greenwich, instead you choose to stay at home and go to a local university. Now you own a house with that lanky, blond boy who used to make your heart flutter in his skinny jeans. You picked a good egg all those years ago. He's kind, thoughtful, ages like a fine wine and makes one heck of a spreadsheet which helps to keep your spending in check and allowed you to get on the property ladder.

There's a few dreams you still haven't ticked off your wishlist. All those dreams of travelling the world with only a backpack, two pairs of knickers and a pair of flips flops never materialised. And you've still never made it to Thailand. But you have been lucky enough to see some places other people only dream of. That travel bug has well and truly bitten you. I don't really think you were ever cut out to slum it if I'm honest.  New York was every bit as incredible as you imagined. In fact, you're taking mum to see it later this year. So you'll have been twice!

You never made it out of your home Essex town despite it being the thing you wanted most in the world. You haven't lived in London but there's still time yet. One thing you'll realise is that dreams don't always happen overnight.

You'll finally work in London on a newspaper! Not quite the Kate Adie you wanted but you've found your passion. It took a long time to get there but you found a job you don't dread going into every day. Just keep slogging away. Interiors make you happy and you get to see your name online. Believe me when I say you'll never tire of that.

You'll never quite shake that crippling self doubt over how you look. You'll grow more confident in time but there'll still be that little voice in your head that tells you your hips are too wide and your thighs are too thick. It's hard. And you'll feel like you're in a constant battle with yourself. But make the most of how you look now. You are hot! That three and a half stone you lose will all come back on when you hit 28. Enjoy it now. It's going to be a lot harder to lose weight when you get older. Trust me, I'm struggling.

Remember that time when you voted for the first time? You come from a Conservative background but at the moment in the voting booth you went for Labour at the last minute. You had no reason why other than thinking it was the right thing to do. It will take you ten years and a certain man to make you realise exactly why you voted Labour. Would you believe you even joined the Labour Party and went leafleting in the General Election?

Life is good. You're surrounded by family and friend who love you fiercely and unconditionally despite your faults. Despite your quick temper that always lands you in hot water, your strong opinions that seem to get you in to trouble and your sheer stubbornness that causes you no end of aggro. Trust me when I say you totally lucked out when they handed out families. You have a great group of girl friends who give you the strength and courage to make your voice heard. Because no matter how much people may belittle and mock you, your voice does matter. You should always be proud of your passionate beliefs. Sometimes this passion can make you come across as not listening to other people's opinions. You'll need to work on this. But don't ever be afraid of standing up or fighting for what you believe in.

But, you're doing alright girl.

4 comments:

  1. Happy birthday, Sophie! My 29th year was brilliant because I got married and visited New York and Rome. I hope yours has lots of treats in store x

    ReplyDelete
  2. Such a cute post Sophie, it's funny how life doesn't ever happen how we think it will, but throws in new, surprising and lovely things at us instead xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. i absolutely LOVE these reflective posts. isn't it so incredible to write down how you're feeling and how things change over time?

    'Trust me when I say you totally lucked out when they handed out families.' - this is so beautiful!

    katie. xx lacoconoire.com

    ReplyDelete

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A Essex based lifestyle blogger who lives a champagne life on a lemonade purse!

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