Thoughts on 2017

Hello? Yes I'm still alive! I fell off the radar a little this month thanks to a broken camera, moving house and a broken MacBook. But my camera is in the repair shop, I was lucky enough to get a shiny new MacBook for Christmas and now I'm all moved in. December has been one hell of a month and I'm slightly glad to see the back of it and finally get settled into a routine.

I'm still scratching my head at the fact we're nearing the end of 2017. As years go, 2017 was a lot better than 2016 which I was very glad to see the back of. As most people say, I'm not quite sure how we got here. It's been a funny old year and one that's been a bit of a rollercoaster. A lot of things have been going on behind the scenes but it's been full of not only lots of tears but also lots of laughs. I feel like I've hardly stopped and life has been an unbelievable whirlwind. Life is whizzing past and I feel like I can't find the handbreak to make it slow down.

Since March, the whole year has been all about getting our house ready. It's been a long hard slog and at times I wanted to ask if I could please give it back. But it all came to head on December 1st as we finally moved in. It's beginning to thankfully resemble a home now rather than a building site. It still has a very long way to go but I feel like there is now a light at the end of a tunnel. I don't think I quite realised just how hard it would be or how sad I would be at moving out from my parents house. I came home once and cried to Connor about how I didn't want to live with him anymore after I had been back to collect some things. I just felt so overwhelmed at the situation and homesick for the home I'd spent 28 years of my life now. But now those feelings are subsiding, it still feels sad but I get so excited to come home after a day at work and do mundane things such as food shopping and re-arranging the cushions on the sofa. I'm looking forward to things quieting down and really enjoy the house as I feel like we've hardly had time to enjoy it thanks to the festive period.

As I enter the last year of my 20s, I feel so content and at peace with my life. I don't think I've ever been happier if I'm honest. Sure it would be nice to have more disposable income, to travel the world more, to lose a bit of weight and live in a house that doesn't see you covered in dust after an hour. But I'm lucky enjoy to do a job that I love, have seen places that other people only dream about,  able to eat three meals a day when some struggle to put food on the table and get on the property ladder by the age of 30. We had around 16 friends round on Christmas Eve and as I looked around, after about 1/2 bottle of gin, I felt so lucky to have such amazing people in our lives. People who have stuck around for the past 12 years through thick and thin. Life is really about who you spend it with, not what you spend it with.

I also like to thank each and every one of you who read this little ramble on the internet. I feel like I've neglected this space this year and I haven't giving it the attention it deserves. I've often thought about pulling the plug but somehow I keep getting drawn back. It's the friendships I've made, the cheerleaders who I've never met and the community that keeps on giving that make me come back for me. Thank you. Thank you very much.  I feel like I've got some of my fire back so expect much more as we roll into next year.

I'm excited to enter 2018. We have some amazing holidays to look forward too, three weddings to enjoy, the honour of being Maid of Honour for my sister-in-law, the fun of living a two-minute walk from our best friends and a two-bedroom terraced house (that still blows my mind) to enjoy.

I'm ready for you 2018. Show me what you got.