Learning to pick your battles





Outfit:
Silky black wrap top: H&M (similar)
Skinny black leggings: Matalan (similar)
Red pointed shoes: Next (similar)
Gold tassel statement earrings: H&M

I'm very highly strung. A trait I have inherited from my dad. And probably my mum too. We are a family of quick tempers which causes for some lovely explosive arguments. Something that first freaked out my boyfriend when we first started going out! I'm not one who is afraid to voice my displeasure and often lash out. Part of me thinks this is great as people will always know exactly how I feel. I don't have a poker face and I know personally, I like to know where I stand and know how other people feel. But the other part? The other part thinks this is tiring. It is tiring to always be fighting. It consumes so much energy and if I'm honest, I really can't be bothered anymore. I increasingly just want an easy life.

Learning when to stay quiet isn't about 'losing' or appearing 'weak'. If anything it means you're being the bigger person. It's so liberating to take a step back and and admit that this is one battle that really isn't worth losing the energy over. By picking to fight every single battle doesn't get you anywhere. You reach a stalemate and if the two of you are as stubborn as each other then that stalemate will last for a long time. All that negative energy doesn't do anyone any good.

Next time someone really gets under your skin, take a step back and really think. Wonder if it is really worth it going in all guns blazing and try not to act immediately. Arguments always have consequences and sometimes they're not consequences you always want to deal with. So make sure that the issue you're fighting over is truly worth it. Ask yourself if the battle will matter to you as much tomorrow or next week as it does currently. Chances are emotions are just running high and it's not actually that important. It's amazing how much better you will feel after opting for the quiet life!


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Welcome to my new living room


It's been a long process - and still ongoing - but we now have our second room complete. That feels good to say! We've finally completed our living room and it's such a joy to come home after work and relax. I wanted a room where I could display all my knick knacks I've collected over the years and one that really represented our personality. A room where people walked into and thought, 'yes this is very much Sophie and Connor's home'. So how did we transform it? Read on! I will put all the links at the bottom.

The owners before us loved colour and the walls were a very bold Quality Street purple shade. It didn't really fit into my minimalist wall theme. It also boasted a carpet that absolutely reeked of cat wee so didn't stay very long at all. I'm not much of a carpet fan at all if I'm honest so decided to splash out on a real wooden floor as we don't plan on replacing it. The dining room had been blocked off with a partition wall to make an extra bedroom. We took this down to help open up the space and it's been a revalation. It's made the house look so much bigger and although we're not using it as a dining room, it's really helped to have that extra space.






There was a white York Stone fireplace that had a very distinct 80s feel to it. This had to go straight away so my boyfriend and his dad very kindly got rid of it in the first week. We had been told by the previous owners that it was an open fire but when we looked into it further, it turned out it wasn't actually safe. The gap was too small and it would have cost too much money to make it bigger. Money that we didn't have. So we went to plan B. Thanks to the partition wall being taken down, the fireplace was no longer in the middle of the room. So my dad and Connor boxed out the fireplace with plasterboard to help make it central. I absolutely love how it looks and it's such a talking point of the room. I'm obsessed with grey as I think it makes a great neutral. It's a shade that so many other colours go with. Farrow & Ball's downpipes is that dark, charcoal grey that I craved and was the perfect choice. The patchwork tiles help to lighten it up and stop the area from being so dark. Yellow is my all time favourite colour and I was keen to incorporate this into my living room. Mustard and grey are one of the best combinations so I choose to use mustard as an accent colour.

One thing I desperately wanted was a gallery wall. For the past five years we've been trying to collect prints from all the different cities we've visited. We haven't managed to pick one up in every place but I'm so happy with the ones we've collected. I love that every time I glance at them I'm immediately transported back to happy memories. I opted for an array of difference coloured frames to help make the pictures stand out against the white wall.





I'm not a fan of blank walls and my boyfriend isn't a fan of things on the wall. So as a compromise I picked up the copper shelf to help display some trinkets and make it feel homely. By having a shelf, my trinkets feel much more contained and less like clutter. When we went to Copenhagen, our Airbnb had a billy bookcase in their living filled with little knick knacks they had collected all over the world. I've totally stolen that idea. At the minute it mostly just houses my travel books but I do have Matryoshka dolls from Budapest, a programme from Aladdin on Broadway and a traditional Dala wooden horse from Sweden. I'm very much looking forward to filling it up!

The next project? Saving for a boiler and moving it to the loft so we can decorate our bedroom!

White paint: Cotton White Dulux
Grey paint: Downpipe Farrow & Ball
Grey and white patterned tiles: Wickes
Glass vase: LSA International via Homesense*
Grey concrete planter: La Redoute
Yellow planter: Sainsbury's
Light grey chaise lounge sofa: DFS*
Mustard armchair and matching stall: IKEA
Grey metal floor lamp: IKEA
Grey side table: La Redoute
Black wooden bookcase: IKEA
Custard cream cushion: Nikki McWilliams
Gin cushion: Matalan
Abstract cushion: Sainsbury's
Mustard patterned cushion: Rooi*
Grey crochet stalls: Aldi*
Copper shelf: Maisons Du Monde
Mustard herringbone throw: H&M
Grey radiator: Soak.com
Black metal cage lampshades: IKEA
Gallery wall picture frames: Wilko and IKEA
Gallery wall prints: From travels
NYC print: Oliver Bonas
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Restaurant review: Roti King, Euston, north London


As I've mentioned before, next year is going to be a pretty intense travel year and I need to start making sacrifices to make it happen. One of these sacrifices is cutting down on the amount of time I eat out. Something I've been missing terribly. So I've been keen to find the cheap eats in London and I've stumbled across a gem.

Earlier on in the week, I met up with Hannah and Michelle for an evening of gossiping and Malaysian food. I'm actually off to Malaysia next year and really wanted to try some of the local cuisine before I jetted off. When Michelle mentioned her dad, who is actually Malaysian, declared Roti King as the best Malay food in London I knew I was in for a treat. You're unable to book for Roti King and most likely will encounter a queue. But stay put as it moves very quickly. Also be sure not to judge it from the outside because it honestly doesn't look like much. But you're here for the food, not the decor. 




After waiting for 40 minutes we were finally shown to a table and the fun began. As Michelle is a veggie we opted for a few vegetarian dishes. So what did we order? We tucked into roti Canai which is a bowl of dal, not as lentil-heavy as an Indian Dal, alongside two flaky roti. The gooey cheese roti was absolute heaven and we actually ordered another one once we scoffed the first one. In fact, I think I'd just order six plates of these next time I visit. Cooked in shrimp paste, Kangkung Belacan or Morning Glory is a endless pile of stirfry water spinach. It was the perfect accompaniment to the other dishes. Hannah and I shared a beef and spring onion dish on Michelle's recommendation which was very moreish and we all snuck a bite of Michelle's sea spiced aubergine. Delicious! 

Roti King is not somewhere where you sit and linger, you eat your grub and you leave. But service is done with a smile and the food is very quick to come out. We ate six dishes with a soft drink each and  it cost £14 per person including a tip. Almost unheard of in London! The food was so tasty and it's definitely somewhere where I can see myself visiting time and time again. In fact, I'm trying to arrange a date with my boyfriend so he too can try it before we jet off. I'm now so excited to eat all the food in Malaysia! 


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A Essex based lifestyle blogger who lives a champagne life on a lemonade purse!

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sophie.warner89@yahoo.co.uk.

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